


Noise of Rain

by Jafndaegur



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Drama, F/M, Guess Sesshomaru will be my Lan Wangji, Hurt/Comfort, Kagome literally goes to the dark side, MDZS AU, Mo Dao Zu Shi au, Slow Burn, Song Lyrics, Song: NoiseofRain, Tragedy, Will get worse before it gets better
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-25
Updated: 2020-11-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:02:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 9
Words: 16,930
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24373978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jafndaegur/pseuds/Jafndaegur
Summary: Tired of being a jewel detector.Tired of being used and not cared for.Something starts to prick at the edges of Kagome's power, determined to set her on a path of self-preservation. However, thanks to some silly teenage curiosity and a spider-hanyou's foot, Kagome takes a turn onto the single-planked path instead of a wide road bathed in light.
Relationships: Higurashi Kagome/Sesshoumaru, InuYasha/Kikyou (InuYasha)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 107





	1. Endless Forlorness Made Me Numb

Kagome watched with pursed lips as the last of the sun set over the horizon. Gilded rays fluttered over the earth, streaming across the trees and grass like rivers of fire. Warm. Beautifully and utterly warm. The dying sunlight drenched her skin, and she tilted her head back—trying to drink in it's comfort. 

Trying to ignore the pressing cold digging its way into the edges of her senses.

Sunset's birth left a wake open for the creatures she'd come to dislike and maybe even hate. Soon she knew the faint pale wisps of the Soul Stealers would come into view. They would approach but never broach, as if taunting the unspoken agreement of distance. Time and time again, they teased the limits, dancing along the edge of her sights until she spun around. In the back of her mind she wondered if it would be worth it to just fork her spirit over to Kikyo. The undead priestess deserved a life, free from trickery or deceit. Something pure—

_Only caught by the ascended._

After all, before her egregious turn to...what Kagome liked to think of as the emo rebellious phase, Kikyo had been rather fair and just. The death dealt to her an unfair blow by fate into the hands of a psycho spider demon.

But as the thought began to teeter close to the cusp of action, Sango's voice called her from their campsite and the idea dissipated.

Still. 

That darkened patch in the back of her mind, the one that hid behind bright smiles and dazzling sapphire eyes, pulsed. It reached out and brushed against her reiki, causing the edges to crumble to dust, unreplenished. Not that Kagome knew.

It wasn't as if anyone were helping her cultivate her priestess powers. So if she felt a bit more fatigued or a little more drained, she blamed it on the fact that Inuyasha was nowhere to be seen in the camp. Although she hadn't expected to see him. With the Soul Stealers in close proximity, they always chimed his cue to leave.

_The passing scenery is going to collapse—_

Cold wrapped her mind and complete midnight gripped her reiki. She cried out for help but no one could hear. 

They didn't need her. Just a jewel-shard detector. They didn't want her. Just a lesser reincarnation.

_—along the obsequious side._

"Oi, Kagome," Inuyasha's voice drew her from her sleep-deprived autopilot. "Can't you pick up the pace?"

Her brow twitched and she tried to find a good reason to not "Sit" him then and there. But her chest heaved and the exhaustion washed over her, and she acquiesced. Today was neither the time nor the place. As their group moved forward in the direction of the next Shikon jewel piece when the hanyou had picked up scents of Sesshomaru traveling their direction. In a bout of stubbornness, he refused to change course. Insistent that if his half-brother wanted to fight, then he wouldn't shy away.

Kagome's brow rose as Sesshomaru’s own little group met up with theirs. 

Rin perched happily on Ah-Un's back, Jaken in tow, and the proud daiyoukai at the front—the little quartet brushed passed them as if they weren't there. Other than the pleasant wave and hello Rin shouted in their direction, it was almost like they didn't exist.

Almost.

As they continued on, Kagome shivered as the sensation of Sesshomaru’s youki swept over them. It probed with an innocent inquisition that was disarming. She wondered why he was searching _to change the hidden_. But in the moment that she detected his power, it eased away and left them.

"What an asshole, he probably just came around to show-off," Inuyasha huffed.

Kagome wondered if that was the case. The full youkai had been searching for something. But what? 

She felt herself going to the dark spot in her mind, wondering if she took hold of it and reached out—would Sesshomaru’s presence return? Was this darkness, this strange thing, was this what he looked for? Kagome felt half inclined to try. She wanted him to turn around.

To notice that she felt…

Miroku called out that he noticed a dark aura from the north, something suspicious and chilling.

Kagome sighed and supposed that it didn't matter how she felt. Hitching her backpack onto her shoulders, she closed her eyes and sifted for that familiar feeling of the sacred jewel. While she wasn't sure, something stirred her heart in the direction the monk had pointed to. 

With a triumph smile, she hopped up to the front next to the half-demon. "I'm not 100% sure, but I think there's a shard in that direction."

That pleased Inuyasha enough. "Alright! Let's get a move on then."

They made camp a couple miles out from wherever they were headed next. A heavy dread had covered the little campsite, the nearby evil seeping close enough to have everyone on edge. Inuyasha and Miroku both kept a vigilant watch neither one comfortable to rest. Sango helped keep Shippo and Kirara calm enough to doze into a restless sleep. Kagome stared off into the distance. The Soul Stealers were in the opposite direction of the unholy aura; wandering, looking.

But unlike the previous night where they had toyed with the notion of trying to take her spirit again, their movements differed. Unorganized and haphazard—the ghostly creatures meandered in confusion.

Heart pounding against her chest, Kagome couldn't help the small smile wiggling its way onto her face. In her mind's eye, she cupped the darkness more. After all, it had swallowed her reiki whole, hiding it from even Miroku's detection.

_It protected the treasure by throwing away the guidance everyone depended on._

The middle of the night sung out to her and she awoke on a cold sweat. Someone was crying. But everyone had fallen asleep. Miroku and Inuyasha seemed fitfully sleeping at best, while Sango and Shippo curled in for warmth against Kirara's warm side. The fire-cat however, glanced at her with worried large eyes. 

Kagome hoisted the holy bow and arrows onto her shoulder. She gave an appeasing pet the demon's nose.

"Don't worry, I'm just going to investigate," she murmured gently. "Something's off. And I want to make sure we don't walk into a trap later."

Kirara gave a low growl but she did not move otherwise.

Kagome smiled and snuck forward. The morning had yet to start, so the air felt frigid and moist. Dew just barely started to accumulate on dark forest and heavy grass. Pushing her way through the underbrush, the inner compass in her chest pointed the direction she needed. Not to mention the voice she'd heard began to cry louder. Words still weren't quite comprehensible but the sentiment was there.

The forest started to scar away, replaced by shale and growing rigid crags. Heavy mist permeated the area more. Kagome drew her bow and crouched low, still persisting. The crying started to take on a form.

_Noise of rain._ It wept. _Noise of rain your footsteps cry._

And suddenly just like that, Kagome spun around, arrow ready to shoot. Naturally, Naraku stood behind her—his arms behind his back, his face pensive.

"Kagome," he greeted, voice heavy and hesitate.

Her brow cocked. "Naraku. What do you want?"

_Noise of rain—_

"What are you doing here so far from your watchdog?" He asked, still nothing but curiosity and even perplexity radiating off of him. 

_—your footsteps cry._

"Something called me," she whispered.

The spider hanyou's crimson eyes narrowed and he walked away. "Follow me."

As they trekked, the mist began to seep with a type of miasma, but for some reason... It didn't hurt her. Shady, inky tendrils looped slow through the air as they trudged upwards, following the rise of the mountains.

"I found this place, yet it confounds even me." Naraku drawled, dark hair wavering. "There is some type of life. But it refuses to interact."

"Can you blame it?" Kagome bit back.

He chuckled darkly.

They reached the peak. 

Below them an infinite spiral of darkness. Except this time not one voice cried out to her. They all whispered and unfurled. They all heard her. 

They reached for her.

"What's down there?" She murmured. 

"As far as I can tell, these are burial mounds." Naraku hummed. "Any one place you dig, there are bound to be bones."

The darkness over her reiki swelled. Kagome trembled.

"The miasma here is not my doing," Naraku continued. "It's not poisonous. Just resentful. It's quite the odd place."

She reached out her hand and the voices smiled. _"You are wanted here. Please help us here._ ** _This is the end of all lies._** _"_

"I don't think it's resentful," she whispered. 

"Interesting theory," Naraku's voice curved and drawled. "Would you like to test that?"

Before she could ask what he meant, his foot collided into her back. She screamed as her body tottered over the edge. Loafers slipped, hands grasped air, and her body tumbled into the abyss' embrace.

Weak and limp she couldn't move her limbs. Every fiber, every bone, everything must have shattered at the impact's drop. Her lungs heaved painfully. The voices giggled and suddenly they were no longer begging but controlling. They grabbed at her, trying to tear her apart and reach for the reiki within her soul.

Yet that darkness from earlier, the darkness that had appeared one day and started to grow the next…

She imagined Inuyasha looking mournfully around his surroundings, wondering where she abandoned him—just like his first lover...

Her mother and brother called out for her endlessly. Their worried tones climbing and climbing but never finding the ears they wanted…

Sesshomaru’s youki poked and prodded, searching, searching, searching for her…

Her darkness consumed every part of her reiki, like a wildfire over a bonfire, it ignited a flash that had her toes digging into the ground and her will sending her to stand.

Her aura spread and she clenched her jaw, commanding the voices to quiet.


	2. Inside My Soul, I Hear You Calling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Slight violence warning. Nothing graphic, but just a heads up.

Sesshomaru’s brow arched and slowed his stride. The overwhelming stench of familiar hanyou approached at an alarmingly fast pace. His footsteps paused completely and he tried to sort the odd feelings that wormed in his chest. 

It had been a long time since he had last seen the little Shikon Jewel group. He didn’t know the exact time—that was a human thing. But Rin had grown a bit, and the seasons had changed from the balmy to near-cold.

And all through that time he’d not heard a peep of Inuyasha or his group. It was as if they’d disappeared completely from the earth.

“M'Lord?” Rin called from her spot next to Jaken, her skippy step half-hearted.

Sesshomaru’s brow furrowed as the dirt road kicked up dust and the wind blustered about them.

If it wasn’t for the scent of utter desperation and surprising lack of hostility—the daiyoukai would have drew his sword before a heart beat.

 _Face to face with the horrid truth_ , Sesshomaru watched with growing alarm as Inuyasha sunk to his knees the minute he landed. His forehead touched the ground and his hands rested palm down against the earth. His body heaved, breathless, and his voice rasped.

“Please,” he wheezed. “Please Sesshomaru.”

“Get up you stupid brat,” Sesshomaru gripped the boy’s collar and yanked him up.

Inuyasha sat back on his heels, displaying the full front of his face. Hollow cheeks, sunken eyes, dulled bronzed color to once belligerent glare, the half demon hardly looked recognizable _with a characteristic face fallen to the world_. No fight, no charge, the hanyou was a shell.

“Please Sesshomaru, you have to help us find—”

“I will do nothing if you continue to snivel, Inuyasha,” he snarled.

“Sesshomaru, Kagome is gone.” Inuyasha pressed on. “You, bastard, are literally our last chance. It’s been…it’s been too long. We’ve searched, and searched, and—”

Sesshomaru flexed his fingers, not appreciating the discomfort roiling in his belly. “Have you considered, little brother, that she may be dead? If significant time has passed, I doubt she’s been on holiday.” However even as he spoke these words, he felt angered and uncomfortable. The idea of the little miko being dead was not pleasing. 

Inuyasha stared, appalled.

Sesshomaru continued smoothly, eyes hooded and corners of his mouth tugged down. “But she is not as inept as you believe either. She can take care of herself. Unlike you she is not a child.”

The smallest of sparks flitted through the hanyou’s glower before it disappeared. His gaze swung to the side and grew laden with guilt. “Kikyo came back. Alive. Normal. The same time Kagome disappeared. We—I—started looking the moment we knew something happened.”

“Hn.” Sesshomaru doubted that his little brother started his search so soon. But the undead priestess being alive made things troubling. There was one way for her to regain her humanity… “What do you know?”

Inuyasha’s ears perked up. “There were no signs of struggle. She didn’t put up a fight, all of her things were neatly tucked away at our camp, she’d left while we were sleeping. There’s no trace of her scent, Miroku has looked for her aura. It really is almost like…”

“So you have nothing useful then.” Sesshomaru sneered. 

Inuyasha bared his fangs. “Look. I checked on the other side of the well. You know…where she lives.”

Sesshomaru had the vaguest idea, not the exacts, but enough to follow. Not that he would say—especially to Inuyasha.

“Her scent is stale. Her family is worried. She hasn’t been back home in a long long time.”

Turning on his heel, the daiyoukai gave his attention to his steward. “Jaken. Take Rin and head north. Make camp there. This Sesshomaru will find you once this has blown over.”

“M'lord!” The imp screeched, but whether it was in affirmation or indignation, Sesshomaru could care less. 

“Lord Sesshomaru, please find lady Kagome,” Rin chirped out, her expression scrunched with worry.

He nodded and looked over her shoulder. “Where was the little priestess last?”

“We were somewhere unfamiliar. A mountain range to the west, we’d been going that way to find a shard. Maybe three days by foot from here. But we had to stop, there was a bad evil presence there.”

He would start there then. He did not say goodbye. He did not promise anything. Sesshomaru flew off with a gust of wind in his wake, his mokomoko trailing behind him.

**…**

The little miko disappeared the same day that he and his group had passed through the area. Sesshomaru recognized their own path and the path that they had once taken as well. When they had crossed ways however and he had checked on them, something had been off about the girl.

He couldn’t place what. But it was dark and alluring, a radiance quite different than her reiki but perhaps not as suiting. As he had observed it more with his youki, he couldn’t find a word or placement for it. So he left it alone. The presence clearly was not harming her.

But if he’d said something that day, parted with a word, would she have still disappeared? Was that aura within her something he should have warned her about? Not that he cared.

His body phased through a surprising barrier guarding the mountain range. The energy seeped in anger, the strong hatred spread through mountain range was alarming. No pure evil aura, as far as he could tell, the only thing he detected was resentful energy.

He landed on a high outcropping, a bright yellow patch on the dark grey mountainside having caught him off guard. When he observed the area, he realized it was sheet upon sheet of yellow talismans. Not unlike the ones that the monk with Inuyasha used. But these…Sesshomaru’s nose wrinkled. These were written with blood.

 _We can’t stop_ , Sesshomaru followed the trail of talismans leading him along the wall. The blood on the talismans, without a doubt, belonged to the miko. Their trace lured him with a tumultuous power drawing him closer and closer. _We won’t drop._

He stood at the epicenter of the mountains, a steep crevice before him—it’s maw stretched wide. How far it went down he couldn’t guess. But he noted the strand of talismans that appeared from the dark depths and lined one on top of the other up the wall. Like a rope.

Sesshomaru lifted his brow with a disdained calculation. The only questions now, how did she end down there, and why all the bizarre talismans?

The bloody writing had darkened and faded, the smell faint and on its last legs of detectability. So Kagome hadn’t been in these mountains for a while, his guess was she left around the tail end of the warm season. 

But where would she go—if not home or his brother?

A pulse surged through the air, a reverberation that rattled his teeth and caused his bones to shake with a single word. “Follow.” Sesshomaru would not heed a command save his own, however after piecing apart the summons, he detected Naraku’s aura and his brother’s. So the spider had made a move. But the strange emulation of power was not his. It was new and foreign, something that had a strong tantalizing irregularity that beckoned him closer.

Light surrounded him and Sesshomaru sped in the direction of the scents, his blood rising in excitement—the overwhelming joy of a hunt starting to circulate through his veins. He appeared with gust and gale, his sword drawn. Except the the battlefield was not what he expected. 

Dead saimyosho littered the ground, along with various unidentifiable incarnations. They were not mutilated or in any way harmed. Just cold and prone. While Inuyasha and his group fought to disperse the miasma on ground level, the overwhelming sound of a fife echoed through the air in a haunting and lilting call above the dark cloud. There, at the center, were two forms. 

One was a figure dressed in a pale grey yukata and and dark green haori. Dark, inky hair wavered dangerously while fingers danced over the flute with ease. The music clawed through the air, while midnight tendrils danced around the figure in the sky. The flutist reverberated with overwhelming power and energy. 

Sesshomaru’s eyes widened.

_No more smiles you fake._

As Sesshomaru sped closer, his heart pulsed violently as the song summoned his. Bright, glowing crimson eyes lured him in closer. His pulse raced in his veins.

 _Thus_ —

The second figure at the epicenter was a writhing Naraku. His body trapped, quite appropriately, in a web of the dark inky tendrils produced by the melody of the fife. They twisted him and rendered him like a puppet, manipulating him like strings until a small but dazzling orb was produced from the hanyou. The orb. The Shikon Jewel. The figure fished the jewel back to themself—herself, Sesshomaru noticed as he grew closer. The scent of miasma no longer blocking it out with the growth of his proximity.

His eyes widened, the familiar smell bracing his senses. He hurried faster, shouting. Shouting what? A warning? A command? A plea? So unlike him.

But the darkness that warped Naraku into something unnatural, the darkness that she commandeered—it was unlike her.

She raised her arm to the air, the round and complete Shikon now clutched in her fingers.

— _the hands of the clock that passed the twelve_ —

The resentful energy violently lashed through the air and into the jewel. In an instant it darkened. Time paused

— _will pierce the starry sky_ , as crimson eyes flashed to azure as the jewel dispersed into dark flecks of dust.

The woman stared at him as the pieces fluttered away, as Naraku howled angrily, as the world around them quieted. 

“You have a lot to explain,” Sesshomaru growled, “Miko.”

Her brow furrowed and lips pursed, her eyes screamed _outragers drive me nuts._ “Ah Sesshomaru. I’ve a hard time believing this is concern speaking. No offense.”

His lips curled in distaste. 

“Hold that thought,” she smiled sheepishly as the red steeped back into her eyes.

 _Outragers drive me nuts_. 

The dark tendrils flashed into ravenous fury, attacking Naraku again without relent this time. Sesshomaru lurched forward, intent to prove that with his power and sword would be the demise of the spider.

She laughed as the resentful energy tore Naraku to pieces instead. She flashed the daiyoukai a girlish grin as the spider hanyou fell to the earth below. With a satisfied nod, she wiped her hands on the hem of her haori.

“Defeat Naraku, check. Shikon Jewel wished away? Check. Miasma gone to help them down there?” She gestured down to Inuyasha and her old friends below, now watching with disbelief as the poison cloud faded with the death of its creator. “Check.”

He stared at Kagome with a narrowed wary gaze.

“How’s that for just a shard detector?”

_The raging howl of the underdog._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading^^


	3. Without Forgiveness, Rather than Rusted by Falsehood

A holy arrow split the moment away, surging forward in a torrent of electric blue power. 

Sesshomaru’s sword lashed out, too fast to see, and yet it was not he that felled the arrow. Kagome's eyes glowed haunting and bright crimson, a cruel and pained smile on her face. The holy arrow hovered mid-air, grasped by the inky tendrils of dark energy.

"Oho? Glad to know Kikyo is using her newfound humanity the same as she always had." She glared and the arrow flipped around, hurtling back to the earth.

Below they could hear Inuyasha shouting—Sesshomaru could see his brother dive and deflect the arrow intended to attack the priestess. His brow furrowed. Plenty of resentful energy spurred the returned projectile, but none of that dazzling bright pink purification Kagome kept unfiltered.

"Think it's high time I say hi?" Her voice fluttered through the air innocently. "It's been a while, hasn't it?"

He didn't answer her. Refused to answer her. Maybe once long ago, he would have given her his thoughts, maybe. But that'd been because she was different. Not a creature that sought unlimited power like this—unlimited, unclean power—but someone who would make a change her own way, through hard work and her own practice. _Pointing out at the darkness, even when she traverses it._

Not this.

She descended slowly, almost ethereal, her outer layer billowing, her yukata delicate and graceful. And yet the splatters of Naraku's blood marring the green and grey cloth said otherwise.

_Her shoes are dirtied—_

"Kagome!" Inuyasha rushed to meet her, his feet trudging through the battlefield sludge.

Kagome landed gracefully, a few slow strides before she made it to her stumbling hanyou. The others followed close behind him, while Sesshomaru took up vigil behind her.

She reached out and embraced the hanyou in a surprisingly gentle hug. He held onto her, no words needed, only a trembling grasp.

Yet the scathing and cold voice still cut through the air. "Get away from her Inuyasha. That thing is not the Kagome you know."

Kikyo's tone perusal was scant of emotion, save her usual mocking righteousness.

Kagome's chin tilted up and she took a step back while Inuyasha whirled around to protest.

"I shouldn't have to explain myself," the priestess hummed. "But even your monk and demon slayer can sense the demonic aura coming from her."

Sango said nothing, her gaze cast to the ground.

Miroku on the other hand fumbled with his words a bit before mentioning an amendment. "It's not evil per say. Just dark."

Sesshomaru’s golden gaze narrowed. So— _without her notice_ —the little miko had scared all of her little friends.

Kagome rested her hand on the fife tucked into her thin obi. "It isn't evil, believe it or not."

"If you let me purify you, I'd be more inclined to believe you," Kikyo bit out.

"Damn, Kikyo—it's just Kagome, what's gotten into you?" Inuyasha's brow was furrowed, and he was clearly disgruntled.

"Were you not just undead?" Sesshomaru ran his fingers through his hair. "It seems you hardly have room to speak."

Inuyasha drew in a sharp breath.

Kikyo smiled half-heartedly and drew another arrow. "And now look at my reincarnation. Fitting she took my place."

"Kikyo, what the hell are you trying to start?" Inuyasha moved to appease her. 

She refused and released the arrow.

Sesshomaru was quick—and yet again _something_ else was quicker. The ringing clang of metal struck the air and warbled, and in a blink, the fight was over.

A small boy with pulled back hair and angered eyes withdrew his scythe. 

"Kohaku!" Sango shouted, pushing past the belligerent miko and mostly-confused hanyo.

"Sister," the young demon slayer offered a weak smile. "I'm happy to see you again."

No time was wasted in the barreling hug. Sango pulled her little brother close, and this time, he returned her embrace. 

"How is this possible?" She looked from him, cupping his face and gazing at Kagome and back to him. "The Shikon was destroyed."

"I revived him in a sense," Kagome offered. "He's not fully alive. But he's not fully dead. We bumped into each other a month or so back. And I pulled the shard from him. Once he was dead, I brought him back."

Sesshomaru’s brow twitched. A miko wouldn't, and shouldn't, have a power as such.

"Kagome…" Inuyasha's voice offered everyone's hesitance and discomfort.

"Explain," Kikyo bit out.

Kagome crossed her arms over her chest and nodded. "But of course. There's a tea house not far from here. Our little group will make for quite some clientele, but I think what I have to say will be ill suited if we stay on the battlefield."

That much it seemed, everyone could agree on.

**-‐-**

Kagome despite her earlier sardonic tone, seemed on friendly basis with the teashop owner. He welcomed her with a bright smile and familiar call of her name. He waved their little group over to a nice secluded spot, away from regular patrons enough to not be egregious, but close enough to feel included with the surprisingly light atmosphere.

"The regular?" The owner asked.

She waved him off with a friendly laugh. "An extra pot and a plate of bean buns."

He nodded and scooted away.

"I helped him start this place," she pulled the fife from her obi and twirled it lazily. "This entire area was under Naraku's influence three months ago. He's from the mainland and wanted to bring a little taste of home. Once this place was cleaned out of miasma and...other obstacles— _I've deceived these memories in my mind_ over and over again to remember just quite what they were—we built this place."

"You _built_ this place?" Shippo echoed with a little bit of awe. 

The fife waved back and forth with a sheepish giggle. "Well I decorated the place."

Inuyasha huffed.

Miroku and Sango chuckled lightly.

Even Sesshomaru, who really did seem out of place with their little pack, rolled his eyes.

The only one not bemused was Kikyo. "So you did not help with any construction."

Kagome grinned and lifted her brow, the look almost sultry. "I wouldn't be much help there, I don't have nearly enough strength for heavy lifting. But the feral undead in my control handled it just fine."

Kikyo's brow twitched and Inuyasha's amusement turned pale.

"Oh I'm sorry. Undead strikes a nerve I see," Kagone continued. "Corpse. I think that's what I would call them. They don't think much."

She pointed her flute at Sango and her brother. "Kohaku is my only and greatest exception. A feral corpse who thinks and acts almost entirely for himself."

Kohaku looked down at the table and wrinkled his nose a little.

"Corpse?" Sango's whisper was half broken, staggered.

 _Decorated with lies,_ Kagome winced. "Zombie may be better. Not really alive, not really dead. An odd mix in between."

The teashop owner brought their order and swept settings over the table quickly. He seemed to sense the tense mood and left. In the stiff silence, Kikyo graciously poured everyone a cup of tea save for Kagome, Shippo, and Sesshomaru. 

Sesshomaru didn't even bat an eye, and the little fox demon busied himself with forking bean buns to care.

Lounging back, Kagome draped her arm over her knee. 

Inuyasha pushed his teacup in her direction, his ears flattened apologetically against his head.

It made her heart twinge, she'd missed her best friend.

"What right do you have playing with their lives?" Kikyo hummed, staring over the rim of her mug. "It is both the unorthodox and unethical path."

"I wish I could've seen you complain about that earlier," Kagome tapped the fife against her brow. "Tell me again, how long have you been a living human by now?"

The two mikos then engaged in another quiet round of glaring.

"The flute Kagome," Miroku piped up, trying to keep the conversation going. "What does it do?"

"This?" Kagome offered her instrument to him. "It's just an ordinary fife. However I use it to channel the resentful energy, that's what summons and brings the feral corpses to life. I named it Kangaimuryo. Like it?"

Miroku took it in a ginger hold before his eyes widened and he observed it more carefully. "There's no evil aura. There's an aura, but it's not impure." 

"It's an ordinary object." Kagome took it back once he'd finished his inspection. "Although it's sturdy and can hold its own in a fight. Kohaku and I have discovered more than once that it's decent at blocking a blade."

The young demon slayer gave a reassuring nod. "Lady Kagome has been steering away smaller yokai from the Burial Mounds for months now. She uses it to both channel resentful energy and deflect physical attacks. She's skilled."

There was silence. A lingering hesitance blared the looming question that no one wanted to ask. Well, almost no one.

"Why don't you just purify them?" Kikyo rested her chin on her hand, relaxing forward. "Such a simple task for a miko."

An exasperated sigh caused Kagome's bangs to puff up before she stood and wiped off the front of her yukata. "Kohaku, will you return later?"

"Kagome…" Sango was the first to vocally protest.

Kagome smiled gently at first before sending a cruel imitation to Kikyo. " _I love myself_ far too much to waste my reiki on small fries."

Her voice hitched just a bit. "This is easier."

"Oy Kagome!" Inuyasha stood, the table screeching as he pushed it forward.

Sesshomaru rolled his eyes.

"I'll see you guys around," she told him gently before waving. "I have some things to settle back home."

"Home?" Came the hanyou's echo. But there was no response.

Kagome strode out of the tea house long enough to appear proud. Once out of eyesight she slouched and panted, her hand resting on her chest. The demonic energy had risen painfully with each biting nag from she-who-should-probably-not-be-named—it lashed and made restraint difficult. It had taken everything for Kagome not to react negatively. 

Leaving was her best response. 

"It is not easy."

The deep tenor surprised her and she twisted to see Sesshomaru standing nonchalantly beside her. A lazy flick of his eyes told her he feigned boredom. But if it was his mask, why was he interested in seeing her. 

She walked forward, straightening herself out and walking evenly. "Not like it's a walk in a park."

He kept pace, even steps with no trouble maintaining stride. "And yet you walk."

Kagome hummed, well wasn't he talkative today. "You were at the Burial Mounds today. I have talismans there to let me know when anyone arrives there. So why did you go?"

"Hn." 

Maybe not.

"You ever get tired of living in someone's shadow?"

The daiyoukai's brow twitched.

"Yeah, figured that's a yes." Kagome exhaled, resting her hand on the fife tucked neatly against her side. "What happened…helped with that. I'm not in her shadow anymore."

Sesshomaru’s gaze met hers.

"And that's what I'll tell myself is for the best. With the jewel gone, there's no need for me to walk the widely paved road anymore."

She didn't say why. She doubted he cared. But speaking to him and admitting she would keep on the demonic path, lightened her heart—as if Sesshomaru’s troubled silence offered acceptance.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The inspired song for this chapter is "Roll the Dice" by SawanoHiroyuki[nzk] and Takanori Nishikawa.  
> I have no idea what I'm doing with this story, honestly. I've also have never tried to extensively write Kikyo before - so if she feels stilted or stiff, just bear with me! I'm learning as I go ^^" Thanks for reading!


	4. Ordinary Life Alluded Me, for My Duty You Lost Me

Kagome crouched down in the dirt, up to her arms in weeds. She and a few others who had decided to take refuge in the Burial Mounds figured that making themselves self-sustaining with crops would be a solid move. From there they could eat and sell whatever they needed.

Not many people lived with her in the mountains but the tea shop owner, a few of her rescues, and even the odd hanyou had fallen under her care. So, the little clan she’d accidentally built up was now her responsibility. She looked up at the scraggly tents that lined the mountain path in front her. The Burial Mounds by far were not a place someone, anyone, should call home. But somehow here she was.

And Kagome was content.

She stood, her legs creaking as she stretched herself out and began to walk down the path away from the makeshift village. She supposed doing her patrol now instead of later would be better in the long run.

As she made her way down the path, the talismans at the entrance of the mountains told her someone, a group, had entered the proximity. Pulling Kangaimuryo from her belt, she hurried quickly over the patchy land and headed to the grove that spotted the foothills. 

“Lady Kagome!” Came a familiar boyish voice, and she relaxed and slowed her pace.

Twirling the fife in her grasp, she ventured further, “Kohaku! You finally showed up, we were beginning to—”

And then she stopped.

Up the hill came Kohaku who was closely followed by Sango, Miroku, and Shippo. She paused at the sight of her friends. She hadn’t expected to see them for a while since the teahouse incident. Honestly if they wanted to keep their distance, she couldn’t blame them. Afterall she was different.

“Kagome! You’re looking brilliant,” Miroku chirped with his usual chipper mien.

Her friends stood around her while Kohaku excused himself to go settle in at the camp back up the mountain. She waved him off before turning to everyone. Heavy and thunderous, her heart pounded against her ribs.

“We figured we’d take a little vacation!” Shippo hopped from Miroku’s shoulder to Kagome’s, giving her a tight hug around her neck. “If that’s okay …”

Her hands instantly wound around the small kit, her gaze swinging to the fond looks of the monk and demon slayer. 

“With Naraku gone…” Miroku flexed his hand, seeming almost—almost—bashful.

Sango stepped forward. “We figured we’d come spend time with you and help you here.”

And within seconds, Kagome found herself crushed within the embrace of her best friend. Miroku joined them, pulling the small little group against him with his warm arms.

“You’ve done so much for us,” Sango murmured. “And while we don’t understand why you’re doing what you are, we’re not going to let you do this alone.”

“What kind of friends would we be if we just stopped bothering you?” Miroku crooned.

“You guys…” she buried herself in their closeness, breathing in the familiarity and presence of them. It’d been so long and she’d been so alone. “Living up here, it’s kinda rough. Are you sure?”

“Kagome, I’m wounded you don’t think us hearty enough.” The monk gave a reassuring squeeze.

“We’re here to stay.” Shippo assured, clapping his small paws against her cheeks for good measure.

And that was that. 

Kagome led them up the path, instructing them in how to safely traverse the mountain and avoid any pockets of resentful energy that she had yet to purge.

“Where is Kirara?” She asked after a few moments, realizing that the fiery feline was missing from her normally inseparable spot with the demon slayer.

“She’s waiting in the village. Once Kikyo has settled, she’ll be bringing Kaede.” Sango’s face twisted to something along the lines of pitying. “With the original Inuyasha forest guardians back and alive, Kaede felt it was time to move on. So she’ll be joining us.”

Kagome’s heart warmed just a bit more before it cracked. “Wait…then that means Inuyasha’s staying…”

Their group was quiet. No one spoke as the tents came into view and the little field Kagome had been de-weeding. All of it came into view and drowned out the _noise of rain their footsteps cried._

“We’ll see him around,” Sango finally piped up.

Miroku clapped. “That’s right. He’s curious to see what you’ve been up to.” He gave an observant sweep of the area. “Which seems to be starting your own little village! Should we be calling you the Edo Matriarch, Kagome?”

She laughed and lightly tapped him upside the head with her flute. Somehow though, once she introduced them to the others in the camp, that nickname seemed to stick. It was amusing and for some reason and it made her feel independent from “Shikon Miko”. 

**...**

Miroku had been surprisingly good about rolling up his sleeves and helping Kagome till the fields. Within the week between him, her, and some of the others—they were able to make several paddies for growing food. Irrigation would be another problem to worry about later but for now they could start planting. At least hopefully.

They’d missed peak growing season and were edging too close to comfort to the autumn. 

But if they could at least greenhouse some roots—maybe potatoes and radishes—they’d grow enough food to survive the winter. Clever little Shippo set up a perimeter of foxfire to help keep the soil area warm. They could do it.

Sango and Kohaku traveled down the mountain to a closeby village to trade for seeds and roots. Miroku and Kagome had decided to use the few cavern pools that were further up the crags to try and bring down water. They had just decided to stop at Kagome’s room, a cave hidden away from the rest of the growing camp, when Miroku turned around with brows furrowed and face worried. 

“There’s a strong aura,” he said lowly.

And for a moment she worried that he talked about her room. For many reasons she lived in the epicenter of the Burial Mounds where the strongest and most malicious energy wallowed. But in a flash the connection between her and the talismans lining the mountains went off and she sensed the intruder.

They ran. Kagome’s haori whipped around violently while the rings on his staff jangled loudly. They skidded to a stop as they were met with the sight of an almost-impassive Sesshomaru. 

His brow cocked, judgemental, while his arms unceremoniously dumped a large pile of lotus pods in front of them.

“S…Sesshomaru?” Kagome’s chest heaved as she stared between him and the pods.

“Kohaku visited with Rin sometime ago,” he lazily flicked his hand through the strands of his hair. “He mentioned you have instigated a village. How unlike you to become a village matriarch.”

Kagome shot a warning glance to Miroku who completely ignored her heed.

“She’s actually the Edo Matriarch,” he sauntered forward and crouched down to inspect the lotus. “These are quite healthy, Lord Sesshomaru.”

Kagome stared at him, “This is a generous gift I wouldn’t have expected from you.”

She hadn’t meant to be biting in tone, and yet this was so unlike the daiyoukai’s normally negligent attitude towards her.

His golden eyes turned frigid and his lips upturned into a frown. “Until you are ready to come _face to face with the horrid truth_ that you are keeping to yourself, miko—make sure your village isn’t in such shoddy appearance.”

He turned on his toes and lifted into the air, flying away from them. They watched him until he was a mere patch of pale light on the horizon.

“You know, I’d say he was almost worried about you,” Miroku began to make bundles of the plants. 

Kagome rubbed at her temples, the nerves twinged and aching. Did Sesshomaru know? With all of his great and mighty youkai senses, she wondered if he had actually sniffed out her secret. She doubted that was the case, he was smart though and he probably noticed the clues she’d accidentally left behind. Her main worry was her friends finding out what had happened. The dog demon however, she was not worried about protecting him from the truth…she almost wanted him to find out. Not that he would care…

Maybe.

Kagome leaned down and began to pile lotus pods into her arms. They could take the seeds and plant them in a make-shift pond. That would help with the irrigation system too.

What an odd gift from a demon lord.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter was a lot of fun to write, I hope you guys enjoy! Think of this chapter as our intermission (mostly because I'm running low on Noise of Rain lines to include in the story lol). The chapter inspiration song is Cage sung by Tielle.


	5. These are Two Different Worlds, She Walks the Borderline—

Sesshomaru had taken Rin to a village about a day’s worth of travel from the Burial Mounds. They had happened to be in the area, and while his ward went to shop for her supplies, he thought about their next step of travel. Particularly because a bothersome idea had crept into his mind ever since they arrived.

He wanted to go visit the miko in the mountains.

Since the last time he had checked-in on her, he’d noticed they were still struggling to put together their little crop fields. Humans, so fragile and needy that if they could not somehow pertain the correct soil for their crops, they would die. Hah.

So he’d provided lotus pods out of his magnanimous generosity… he was starting to sound too much like Jaken. 

Maybe he should leave the little imp behind for a while, refresh his mind and ears from the presence of the squawky toad.

Going to the miko’s would generate that reprieve—

Before he indulged the thought any further, he squashed it with the sharp pinprick of his claws against his palm. 

Since her sudden change, something drew Sesshomaru to her. Curiosity is what he would like to name it, a strange girl with the power to suddenly obliterate the most dangerous hanyou this world had seen; obviously despite his anger that he wasn’t the one to kill Naraku, her actions had caught his eye. Perhaps it was the sheer brutality of her powers, a miko easily and without pause tearing apart a living creature. While he enjoyed the sight with a great deal of satisfaction, that was uncharacteristic for the young miko. The daiyoukai huffed, if he didn’t know any better, the resentful energy that the miko claimed to use was drastically changing her temperament.

He pinched the bridge of his nose. The girl should feel so lucky that he graced her with the constant barrage of thought. Under normal circumstances he would have never cared. Which ultimately brought him full circle again to the main question at hand.

Why did he care, now?

“Lord Sesshomaru!”

Rin’s voice cut through the air as if she were standing right next to him. She knew better than to call him when in a town unless it was something important. He sped through the street, chasing the child’s delicate scent like a marked path. Damn the humans staring at him, he didn’t care. If someone had dared to cause a single scratch upon Rin’s flesh. Well.

It’d been a long while since he’d razed a village to cinders.

Sesshomaru halted immediately though. 

Rin walked ahead with a skip, her arms full of gauze, salve, and food. She didn’t look for him however, she looked to the side—where a figure accompanied her. Not just any figure, the miko. 

He took in the sight of her, his eyes narrowing. Her hair was shaggy and unkempt. Her clothes too big and overly wrinkled, they hung off her body with an almost scandalous air to them and he wondered if she knew how to actually properly tie her yukata. It was her eyes though, that dawned the answer to his question.

Because a small smile worked its way on her face as she talked with Rin before eyeing her attention to him. And it was those blue wonders that had been so alive and vibrant before that were now dull and tired, hollowed by sleep circles and darkened bags.

The miko who’d had twice as much liveliness as Rin, the miko who stared everything down with joy and easy-going laughter, was now a husk of a human. And that bothered him.

Because there was no explanation for her change.

“Sesshomaru!” She waved with the hand holding her fife, and he had the sudden urge to grab it and chuck it into the heavens.

“Lord Sesshomaru! You came!” Rin pranced up to him with a proud grin. “Lady Kagome mentioned how nice it would be to see you.”

“Rin.” He narrowed his glance. “This one is not here for your beck and call.”

“I know!” She chirped eagerly.

“I wasn’t sure when the next time I could see you would be. It’s already been quite some time.” Kagome admitted with a sheepish look. “And Rin assured me you were nearby.”

Sesshomaru hummed.

“Would you like something to eat?” She continued hurriedly, squeezing Rin’s hand gently before pulling away from the child. “My treat.”

He wondered if she should really be making such an offer. Still the youkai inclined his head.

His ward cheered and the miko seemed to relax. They wandered down a small path in the town that led to a patio restaurant. Fried fish and pork could be seen on the grills, and the smell of rice and soup filled the air. It was homely.

“Tea, sweet soup for the girl, and two spicy plates!” Kagome ordered before ushering them to a table at the corner. 

It was obvious the other diners were wary of the little group. The rumored Edo Matriarch and a daiyoukai certainly did not make for pleasant clientele. And yet Kagome seemed to brush aside the tense atmosphere for chatter. This was the first time in a long time that Sesshomaru had heard her so carefree and well…like her old self. He indulged her.

Their food was brought out quickly, a small bowl of soup and sweet smelling fruit was handed to Rin. Two bowls of rice topped with red-sauced beef were placed in front of him and the miko. She looked ecstatic.

“Things are slow going in the Burial Mounds but what can I say. That place is pretty inhospitable. It’s taken a lot of energy to set up our living there, but it’s coming along.”

The demon lazily ran his fingers through his hair before giving his tea a delicate sip. “This one has noticed depleted demonic presences in this area. Would that be your doing, miko?”

She hid her giggle behind the back of her hand. “I have created a new tool to draw in and horde resentful energy. Without any malicious or evil just floating around willy-nilly, there’s no place for lesser youkai to feed on that negative aura.”

He felt a nerve twitch. Could she really do such feats without corruption? There were reasons why meager demons fed on prevalent evil atmospheres.

“Don’t look so concerned,” Kagome’s smile thinned and she went to absentmindedly twirl her fife. “I’ve got it under control.”

He wondered.

She picked up her chopsticks, laughing when Rin eagerly thanked her for the soup, and started to eat the food with gusto. Sesshomaru felt a small twinge in his chest. Maybe he pondered ceaselessly over nothing. 

He would have thought that if it weren’t for the sharp blast of yellow light that flashed from the folds of the miko’s robes.

She hissed and withdrew one of her yellow talismans. The red writing glittered before the paper combusted. a curse flew past her lips and she stood immediately from the table.

“Sorry Sesshomaru, this is an emergency.” She bolted then, haori fluttering as she fled from the patio. 

The daiyoukai pinched the bridge of his nose, gaze sliding to Rin. “Do you have any money left over?”

“Rin saved a few silver pieces,” her little mouth twisted with concern. “Is everything okay my lord?”

He rose as well. “Pay for the meal, find Jaken. I will return later.”

She nodded. “Be safe Lord Sesshomaru.”

The wind seemed to bend around him as he sped after Kagome, ignoring her startled yelp as he wrapped his arm around her waist and sent them flying for the Burial Mounds. Her hair whipped around like tendrils of ink.

“Miroku is waiting outside of the cave at the center.” She urged him. “You’ll have to wait there if you want to stick around. There’s going to be a massive lash of resentful energy and I cannot handle you transforming into your true form.”

“Doubt in my self control is not a good look for you,” he growled.

“Nonetheless,” she muttered. “Two out of control powerhouses may be beyond my reach if that were to happen.”

He wanted to ask what she meant. But the monk came into view and they touched down before he had the chance. Miroku rushed to them. Roaring could be heard from the cave along with the frantic shouting of the demon slayer.

Kagome shot a panicked look to the man before running inside the cave. Sesshomaru followed her without question or care to the monk’s protest.

She had been right.

The amount of evil aura permeated the small space like a fog, and it weighed heavily on his baser instincts. He clutched Tenseiga, allowing the serene energy to calm his raging inner-self.

Kohaku fought his sister in a fit of rabid rage. His eyes completely rolled back and white, and hair strewn from his usual ponytail. Unlike pass times as Naraku’s puppet, he had an unnatural and unrestrained power about him that thrummed like a barrier. Sesshomaru snarled.

Kagome’s music filtered through the air and the dark energy flooded towards her, which she accepted with open meridians. Kohaku’s fury diverted to her and he rushed her without mercy. Sesshomaru’s temper snapped and he’d enough. He lunged forward, claws intent on putting the whelp in its place.

The music stopped. “Don’t hurt him Sesshomaru, he doesn’t kno—”

That hesitation. One moment. And the mindless boy rushed past the dog demon and attack Kagome front on.

To her credit, she defended well. Her fife parried his first punch, body whipping around as she stoutly kicked him in the chest. He recovered quickly and barreled straight into her, head and shoulder pushing into her torso. Slamming her straight into the wall. The miko gasped out, blood flying from her mouth as she fell to the ground with a stagger. Sesshomaru yanked the boy back and sent him spiraling across the cave. He helped the miko up, eyes widening as the light in the cave flickered.

Her eyes bled red and her balance wobbled. The resentful energy seaped into her body in torrents and in that instant Sesshomaru realized that there was nothing he could do to stop the stream.

Kagome reached into her robe and drew forth a dark grey amulet in the shape of a phoenix. The energies spiraled into it. Her eyes flashed bright crimson, and the daiyoukai loathed to admit that his control waivered. But Kohaku fell to the ground, immobile and screaming. Kagome threw the amulet into the air and caught it with a chant. The dark energy stopped its movement and it became stagnant again. Sango ran to her brother’s side, cradling him close while sobbing his name.

Kagome sagged.

“I thought,” Sesshomaru grit his teeth. “You said everything was taken care of.”

The miko looked at him with a bloodied and tired smile. “I’ve lied to you before, haven’t I?”

“You will stop immediately.” He growled. 

She hid the phoenix amulet back in her robes, and leaned against his side. He had the strongest urge to push her off and storm away. And yet even now, he found himself gravitating to her side

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> we’re coming to the close of the first half! Yay! I think this will probably have about five or so more chapters. Thanks for reading this guilty indulgence of mine~


	6. Light the Fire Here to Find Your Answer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Starting to get into the thick of things…hope you enjoy!

Kikyo’s fingers skimmed over the plain of her belly…it was barely curved, hardly a swell. Yet despite the lack of visibility, she knew a creature grew inside of her, one that she hardly wanted or desired. But Inuyasha practically beamed with the idea of its existence—and it kept his focus diverted most days from the annoyance that called herself the Edo Matriarch. So she was grateful at least for her child’s immediate usefulness. Once it was birthed, who knew.

“Are you sure you do not wish for me to attend as well?” Her voice was even and she realized there was hardly any concern in her tone. She knew that her lover required affection and often she tried to provide it. Falling short and yet not ever really caring.

Inuyasha kissed the top of her head. “Nah, it’s just going to be a boring old summit with a couple ol’ coots. But since they’re outlying shoguns, it might be a good idea to see what they have to say. Besides, weren’t ya going to check the village’s barrier today?”

“I was going to, however I do not wish for anything awry happening with your meeting. It’s unlike you to go out of your way for such things.”

“Keh,” he scratched his nose bashfully. “If I wanna stand equal with the village priestess, then I gotta step up my game.”

“Yes well, keep trying,” Kikyo muttered, donning outer garments to wear over her miko garb. Early winter loomed on the proverbial doorstep, ready to worsen itself on any moment. And despite the increasing weight on her body, the chill seemed to seep through her skin even more than usual. She let out a sigh and turned to look at Inuyasha.

The half-demon regarded her with a twisted gaze, something torn between a laugh and hurt. Rolling her eyes, she gave his suikan a light tug before gracing his cheek with an even lighter kiss. “Be careful then.” Kikyo hummed, before leaving their hut.

It wasn’t as if she disregarded him or held him in little regards. It was also never her intention to be straight out brusque with him. But something since she became human had clicked for her. For while she no longer desired (completely at least) to drag him to the pits of the underworld with her, something relished the sad little looks or the panged winces he would make whenever she was curt. And it was something she enjoyed seeing him chase after her to make up for each little sting. Because it meant that he was moving on and away from his friendship with Kagome. She knew that as long as the two of them were alive, one or the other would always be vying for the hanyou’s attention. While both types were in two different ways - Kagome seemed to be content in her companionship and Kikyo herself wanting to be the subject of Inyuasha’s obsession, she found it amusing that she wound the half-demon further and further around her little finger. Soon enough, with the birth of their child, there would not be enough room left for the little priestess who threw herself off the deep end. Another use for the babe that had yet to be. Perhaps before it was even born, it would have proven its worth.

—

Inuyasha waited with baited breath for Kikyo to leave his scent range. His chest heaved painfully and he tried to not focus on her small jab. Had it been Kagome, it might have been a playful joke followed by an elbow to his side. Nothing more than a quip. 

But the words from his lover always hurt in a way that he didn’t expect.

It didn’t matter. He’d lied about the meeting. But it was still time to go if he wanted to be back by nightfall.

Moving on and forcing himself not to dwell on it, Inuyasha took a tentative step before leaving the village. His feet ran over forest floor and grass and leaves and the world around him slipped by so easily and so quickly. Eagerness flooded his nerves and suddenly he wondered if he would get caught. Not that Kikyo followed him anywhere he went. But she always seemed to know what he was up to. Not that he cared. Again. He was his own damn person, and dammit he was going to go see his best friend regardless of whether or not Kikyo told him to stay away. 

It’d been months since he’d seen Kagome. Summer had just been dying away when she’d disappeared, and fall just born when she reappeared. After that he hadn’t seen her since she’d stormed from the restaurant, his half-brother in tow. 

His frown pulled tight and a growl formed in his chest. 

Every time he’d seen Kagome since her change, Sesshomaru had always seemed to follow in her footsteps like a ghost. The guy acting like a damn lost puppy or something like that. He’d hoped that it had stopped. Nothing good ever came of hanging out with a demon like his brother. 

The mountains where the Burial Mounds towered close now. Their stiff and pointed peaks were coated in snow and he gave an involuntary shiver. It hadn’t snowed yet on the normal earth, despite how cold it had gotten. He wondered if Kagome and the others were safe and warm. It was hard to find protection from the cold up that high. Not much foliage for kindling grew up that far into the terrain, and coming down to bargain for food made traveling difficult. With Miroku up there, he knew that there was a small chance that they were eating well and at least finding enough jobs to feed everyone. But rumor had it that Kagome had more than just her friends up there. Word was from all around demons and half-demons alike had found shelter within the small settlement at the peaks. Last thing he’d heard was there were some seventy to one hundred people up there under her protection. They’d called her the Edo Matriarch, saying how she’d founded her own clan reminiscent of the ones of old. 

He couldn’t imagine it. The gangly, squawky girl who rode her bike around the countryside for kicks seemed a far cry from the demonic and intimidating village matron that townspeople surmised her to be. Yet the last time he’d seen her…enraged eyes and lashing evil aura.

Inuyasha steeled himself. 

He would see her for sure and he would discover the truth behind whatever transformations she underwent. Unsure if he could bring the real Kagome back or not, he would try. Her happiness meant the world to him, and the image that kept repeating itself on loop in his mind was just how sunken and how exhausted she had seemed. Resorting to this “demonic cultivation” as she called it was doing more harm than good. He needed to know why she felt so inclined to keep practicing this dark art. She was a miko for fuck’s sake, was being a priestess not enough for her?

He approached the trail most traveled in the mountains. Right away he could detect everyone’s scents. Miroku and Sango’s, Shippo’s, Kaede’s…Kagome’s. 

A nostalgic twinge pulled through his chest and urged him to run faster. It felt as though he were coming home for the first time in a long time. His breath quickened and his eyes widened. He was scared and excited - would he be welcomed or would he be pushed away? 

Bursting out into the small valley before the village, his mood quickly darkened.

Sesshomaru lounged on one of the village huts, his arm draped over a propped up knee as he kept surveillance over Rin and Shippo playing with a few other demon children in the snow. Sango and Miroku were there too, chopping wood as they watched the children as well. They were the first to announce his arrival - he was sure his stupid brother was the first to detect him - and they did so with smiles and several waves.

Much to his relief, his brother continued to ignore him. And as much as he would like to whoop the older demon’s ass there and now, he was not the goal of his mission. His sole purpose was to visit -

“Inuyasha!”

_Kagome._

Her voice bounced off of the snow and into the air like bells. She emerged from the hut Sesshomaru currently safeguarded, and waved. She pulled a heavy charcoal haori over her shoulders, shuffling quickly over to him with a wide grin. He wanted to cringe away, her scent _reeked_ of his brother. But he noticed with a little touch of pain, that she looked healthier. Her skin wasn’t so jaundiced, and her cheeks and eyes were not so sunken. Her clothes weren’t so baggy on her small frame, and it looked like she’d finally figured out how to tie her robe properly…

His gaze went quickly from her to his brother and back. The daiyoukai continued to evade his observation, and merely laid back on the roof of the hovel and closed his eyes. How arrogant that stupid prick! 

Kagome rushed him in a barreling hug that forced all thoughts from his mind. Her scent flooded with happiness and her arms circled him tightly. All else was forgotten as he buried his face in the crown of her hair.

“Sorry I hadn’t come to visit ya yet,” he mumbled. 

“Miroku said you and Kikyo were heads of the village now,” she whispered back. “I imagine that’s pretty busy.”

“Formalities ain’t my strong suit,” he huffed. “Just keepin’ an eye on things while Kikyo does all the official priestess stuff.”

She didn’t answer to that, and he internally kicked himself for mentioning her. 

Recovering quickly, Kagome grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the little hut she’d come from. “Here, let’s go in. It’s cold! There’s some leftover soup that I have on the fire, you want some?”

“Sure Kags…that’d be great,” he hummed with a faint and fond smile. He allowed her to tug him along. Nothing else existed as he followed her wake into the hut. 

He sat down obediently by the fire, as she rummaged around what he presumed was a common eating hall. There were lots of tables with the fire pit at the center. It was such an odd idea, to have a place where everyone of this village could dine together - but with Kagome as the leader, all of that somehow suited her. It was homey. 

“It’s boar and lotus soup, I hope you don’t mind,” she chirped, serving him a bowl. “We have lotus to eat for centuries because of Sesshomaru, and the other day he and a few other demons caught a herd of boars that were roaming around -”

“Hold on,” Inuyasha didn’t mean to interrupt really. “My half-brother? The walking Ice Prick?”

“Don’t be rude.” She gently cuffed him on the back of the head. “He doesn’t stay long…but he helps out a lot whenever he comes. I guess this is his pitstop between his travels.” 

“A likely story,” he growled. “He’s using you for something.”

“Wow, you just got here and you’re already picking a fight,” rubbing her temples she let out a sigh. “Look can’t you accept he’s doing something nice for us? Even if he is using me for some bizarre reason - we’re getting food and protection out of it. So at worse it’s some symbiotic relationship, okay? We’re fine and he’s fine. Let’s leave it at that.”

“If you hadn’t left, you wouldn’t need to be relying on _him_ to protect ya Kagome.”

He really didn’t mean to dive right into the problem either. His whole intention of this visit had to just be there with her. Nature really knew how to force its ugly head into his personality though - and his nature had always been brazen and confrontational.

“I had to leave.” Her voice lowered and her brows furrowed with anger. “I didn’t have a choice.”

“You up and left in the middle of the night!” Inuyasha raised his voice before he could catch himself. “You didn’t even give us a chance to help you with whatever happened.”

“Did you ever think that I didn’t mean to leave?” She shouted back, her hand swiping through the air.

He pulled his soup out of the way so she wouldn’t knock it over. “Then why didn’t you come back? Three months! Three whole months you disappeared no matter how hard we looked. And when Kikyo came back human and whole - do you have any idea of what we thought?”

“I’m sure you were absolutely overjoyed,” she snarled, eyes flashing crimson. “You wanna judge me for the company I keep? Look who’s talking - she literally tried to drag your stupid butt to hell.” 

“This is not about her.” His stood, standing toe to toe with the angry girl. “Leave her outta this.”

“It’s always about her!” Kagome snapped. There was a flash of resentful energy and then suddenly she was fuming. Her hair whipped by the torrent of evil aura radiating from her while her eyes glowed that eerie vermillion color. Her hand flew to her chest and gripped her robe painfully as her breathing heaved. “It’s always about her. Who do I look like? Kikyo. Who do you always chase after? Kikyo!”

“That’s not fair, I’m right here now aren’t I?” He shook her shoulders, his pulse quickening. 

There was a thump on the roof.

“And even now,” there were tears in her eyes and the resentful energy lashed, throwing tables and dispelling the fire and knocking the pot of soup over. “When my priestess powers are gone and the core of which my reiki was stored all dismantled and transferred through our connection of souls to Kikyo _just_ so my powers could protect itself from the resentful energy. It’s. All. Still. About. Her.”

Inuyasha stilled. Maybe he had misheard. “What?”

“Yeah funny thing,” she laughed now, her tears leaking into her mouth as her croaking giggles came out. “That thing were qi and reiki are stored? That connects all your meridians? I don’t have it anymore. Kikyo does.”

His throat ran dry. He didn’t understand. Powers beyond punching and slashing really ran over his head.

A strong grip grabbed him by the collar and flung him back. Sesshomaru now stood as a solid white wall between him and the growing torment that was Kagome. His brother’s fangs flashed and his eyes bled red. _Leave._

Stumbling back, Inuyasha realized this visit had not gone how he’d wanted. As he fled, Kagome’s cries and Miroku’s and Sango’s startled yells echoed in his ears. His feet ran over mountain floor, and dirt road, and the earth underneath him sailed. Yet everything was pale and devoid of color. Time seemed sluggish and broken. 

He left everything behind him.


	7. I've Been Burning My Heart Out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alrighty boiis, I have no idea what’s happening here except some exposition and angst, so take that with a grain of salt ^^"

Sesshomaru’s baser instincts raged as his youki cast a barrier around him. The last thing they needed was Kagome’s resentful energy lashing out towards the rest of the village _and_ a giant dog demon on a rampage. He clenched his jaw as he swallowed down the urge to transform, to overcome and conquer the torrents thrashing around the miko.

He grabbed her wrist and sharply yanked her arm back.

“You will stop this,” he ground out, his teeth clenched. “Immediately.”

Her sobs wracked her chest while her other hand clenched at her robes where the Phoenix Amulet was hidden. That damn amulet. It was pulling the surrounding energies towards her, and while her body didn’t absorb the aura, the energy permeated closely. Slowly her eyes creaked open, flooded with haze and tears. Flickers of crimson flashed as her blue eyes sought for dominance past the effects of her powers. Shakily her hand clenched the amulet and the resentful energy siphoned in and disappeared with a buzz. 

Kagome sank to her knees.

Sesshomaru dropped her arm. 

Miroku burst in with his staff raised, Sango armed with her boomerang immediately behind him. The two rushed to their friend, falling to her and fussing frantically over her. Kagome’s breathing trembled. 

One of the demons—a bull who called himself Tetsu—also came in, more hesitantly than the monk and slayer. His heavy brow was set and his hand perched cautiously on the sword at his side. He took one look at the miko on the ground and then the daiyoukai standing above her. With furniture flung everywhere, the fire completely fizzled out now, and food splayed along the whole floor, the dog demon could only guess what Tetsu imagined had transpired. Still the bull approached him. He gave a polite bow before gesturing to the door.

“Myself and a few others on patrol sensed the resentful energy…” Tetsu winced. “It’s influence didn’t reach the village, but the children who were playing outside were worried.”

Sesshomaru dealt him a caustic stare.

The bull demon cleared his throat, looking away towards the panicked group huddled on the floor. “Is…Lady Kagome alright?”

“Does she look in fair condition?” Sesshomaru growled lowly, his claws flexing. More often than not he found it easy to ignore any of the lesser demons that lived in the village. But now, he wanted nothing more than to disembowel the person in front of him.

“T…tetsu—” Kagome croaked, wobbling on fawn-like legs as she stood. “Could you and the others clean here? I have some business I need to take care of.”

“My lady,” his relief was palpable as he was rescued from the infuriated dog demon. 

Kagome stumbled out of the building, offering murmured apologies to her friends as she left the dining hall. Sesshomaru watched her with a narrowed glance before deciding it would be best to follow her out. With her current condition, she was susceptible to widespread aura in the Burial Mounds. That could result in many negative options that he would prefer not happen. Miroku lightly tugged at the end of his sleeve. The daiyoukai offered him a brief moment of attention.

“Please be gentle, asking her about what happened,” there was a knowing look in his cool gaze, as if he’d comprehended the argument from behind the other side of the door. “It was very difficult…don’t press.”

The dog demon huffed and ventured out of the hut, pushing past three other demons who loitered anxiously outside. So the little miko’s outburst had caused a problem. She had greater power than she even realized if the rest of the village had been terrorized as Tetsu had claimed. Not that the bull had anything to particularly lie about, but it was just easier to imagine her powers not spearing past the walls of the hall.

Kagome made it further up the mountainside and sat at the mouth of her cave, a hole in the side of the cliff away from the villagers. She claimed it to help her focus when trying to drive out the demonic aura from the Burial Mounds but now more than ever Sesshomaru wondered if it was to isolate herself when outbursts or problems became uncontrollable. She lounged back when she noticed him, her gaze never leaving the village. From the vantage point they could see the hovels and children running to play with Shippo and Rin. The colored shapes of the monk and slayer were also there, talking to a now larger group of residents. The miko’s mouth pursed as he watched her gaze train in on the little group. Sesshomaru stood beside her.

Neither of them said anything for the longest time. Behind them inside the cavern, he noticed the chilling whispers of the resentful energy. Part of him scoffed at their prods at his pride—at their all too trivial jabs towards what he supposed could be insecurities. On the other hand, he knew that the miko could hear the voices too. And he wondered just how something so human like her could ignore their tempting call for so long.

To just give in and lose control.

He wondered if had this young woman in front him been the same girl she was with her brother, if she would cry or lose her nerve at the way the demonic energy spoke. But she never mentioned it bothering her. Never whined. Simply, watched, adapted, and utilized it to her own advantage. Sesshomaru almost wished to hear her squawky complaints, if only to see a glimpse of that same happy-go-lucky human he’d first encountered.

“Naraku pushed me down, from the top," she said suddenly, the words falling off the edge of an exhale as if she were all too hurried to say them.

He glanced up from the high peaks that towered above them. Things started to click. "There is an opening in the ceiling of your cave.” He murmured.

“I fell in from there.” She nodded. “All of this was thick and heady with demonic energy. You couldn’t see not a lick in front of you.”

He frowned. Then _how?_

Kagome rested her chin on her knees, absent-mindedly rubbing her shins as she kept her watch over the Burial Mounds. “A part of me had always wondered if I would get to keep my priestess powers. The only reason I was born a miko is because of Kikyo’s soul.”

Brow twitching, Sesshomaru found that he could argue with that.

“And maybe ultimately, that’s what gave all of the resentful energy a chance,” her voice hitched and she shook her head. “Me being jealous. Me being angry.”

“Natural feelings when you are constantly compared to someone else,” he murmured.

She paused for a moment, as if rolling his words around in her head before continuing. “Justified or not. It was still enough to push my reiki out…and let the demonic energy in.”

Sighing, Sesshomaru sat next to her. “Meridians are odd things that connect both body and temperment—affected by even the slightest of external or internal changes, but even still you should not have lost your core.”

“You would think that and yet,” her voice wobbled again, and he found that he couldn’t take his gaze away from her. “It’s gone. I don’t know much about cultivation of qi or reiki, I was just barely learning the ropes with Kaede before all of this. But both she and Miroku checked. It’s gone.”

“To the other miko?”

“That’s my best guess,” Kagome whispered. “We share a soul, and these powers and my core might have sensed a way to escape the literal tide of resentful energy here. How else could she have become human again if not for taking more of our life force?”

The miko wasn’t wrong. 

Even with Tenseiga he could not have raised the undead priestess to the level of life she now enjoyed. She would actually need a real and physical fleshy body for that. And yet, here they were.

“I absorbed every ounce of resentment within a five mile radius, I think.” She wrapped her arms around her legs. “I guess you could say I’m full of it.”

“And what of the Phoenix Amulet?” Sesshomaru questioned. “Does it not also absorb the energy?”

She nodded. “It does. I couldn’t keep absorbing energy, I probably would have died. With the absence of my core, there was just a bottomless void to keep pulling in the demonic energy. It was…well it was what it was. But with the Phoenix Amulet, it acts like a siphon. It filters in the demonic energy for me and feeds it little by little, that way I’m not completely soaking everything in all at once.”

“…so when you destroyed Naraku?" 

She gave him a smile between sheepish and sly. "I had just created the Amulet. I guess I was coming down from a demonic energy high.”

The daiyoukai huffed.

They settled into silence for a moment. Laughter of children floating up from the village.

“What would happen, should the Amulet fill up with too much energy or even break?” He finally asked, something tugging uncomfortably at his gut. 

“I doubt it’ll ever fill up,” she snorted. “I designed it to store a lot. But I guess if the seal on it—”

“Seal?”

“Mm. So no one else can utilize the energy, the only way you can sever its connection to me is by dropping some of my blood on it.”

The feeling worsened.

“So I supposed if it ever filled up or if the seal broke…all of that demonic energy would flood towards the closest host.”

“You.”

“Perks of my soul being some sort of vacuum. Granted the seal breaking is an easy fix, I’d just have to cast it again. But whatever escapes in that meantime will go straight to me.”

“Is that not a concern for you miko? Such a rush of malicious aura would destroy your temperament.” He nearly growled.

“It’s happened once, and I survived.” It was a simple answer.

“There is no precursor to a core being transferred, Kagome,” he finally bit out. “It is surely there. Once you find it, however weak it may be, you can cultivate it to dispel the resentment your body intakes.”

For the first time in a long time, Sesshomaru finally heard her laugh. His blood fumed.

“It’s not there Sesshomaru, you’re more than welcome to look—”

“You know not what you ask.”

The miko blinked up at him with surprise. “I don’t?”

“Am I not a demon? I will have different methods than the old priestess and the monk.”

She hummed before sitting up a bit more. “Try me." 

Something in her eyes widened. It glittered and sparked like her old persistent ways. It drew him in and he chased it.

"Pull your hair to the side.” He commanded.

She obediently did as told, baring her neck to him. His nostrils flared momentarily as he leaned in and took her scent. Lips hovered above skin and gilded eyes flickered their attention up to curious azure.

“This one could kill you in your moment of carelessness.” He muttered.

Kagome smiled. “But will you?”

He decided for now, he wouldn’t. Sesshomaru noticed the tangible shiver that trembled through the miko when his tongue laved across the dip of her neck. Still she kept her posture straight and her reactions no further than that. Good. 

He gave her no warning when he bit her, sinking his teeth somewhere with plenty of nerves and sinew to cushion his fangs. She squeaked and shook a bit more, her fists clenching into her yukata. But true to her statements, pain was no stranger to her. Sesshomaru closed his eyes as he lapped up her blood, beginning to sense the ebb and flow of her life force. Once he found their presence, it was easy to track her meridians. Sweet and tangy against his palette, her blood gave an easy trail to the center of her being—her heart beat rapidly like a frightened caged bird. He extended his youki into her, using it like a compass and sweeping past her heart into the center of her being. Where her core was. 

Or should have been. 

He pulled away suddenly with a snarl, hand covering his mouth as black ichor slipped from his mouth through his fingers to splatter the floor. His body buzzed with a sudden influx of resentful energy. His beast raged against every ounce of sentience. Those voices that had been mere whispers at the back of the cave now screamed within his ears. They throttled his veins and arteries until he found no control of his own body. Youki flashed hotly and suddenly he could feel his baser form taking over and sending him into a flurry of transformation. Hands growing larger, mouth extending into a snout and fangs, body suited for all fours instead of arms and legs.

But as quickly as the possession happened, it disappeared. Soft lips pressed against the crescent moon at his forehead and hands tethered his shoulders and body back to the earth.

His claws dug into Kagome’s side.

“There’s nothing,” he rasped, claws tearing into her flesh as he regained his control. “There’s nothing but resentment.”

“I know.” Her voice lilted calm and unbothered, she held him close. “There’s nothing there anymore.”


	8. Oh My Dirty Hands, It'll Never Fade

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: major character death
> 
> Also by the way...for those of you who know the MDZS storyline, I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize this was going to be my Qiongqi Path chapter akdfjowidjakd

Kagome's sight whipped around as Kohaku ran towards her shouting. 

She and Miroku were passing out food packages to the villagers, the morning freezing and snowy again. It had been a long time since they had seen Sesshomaru, so they had begun to ration out food to last until Kagome could make it down and back up the mountain safely. It was too icy down the steep mountain slope to bring a cart so they just needed to bid their time out. Luckily the adults and teens were decent at hunting, but not a lot lived on the mountains. So resources were becoming scarce as winter deepened.

Her hands trembled.

"There's an army approaching." Kohaku wound the chain of his sickle around his hands.

Kaede and Sango approached now as well. 

"What is the commotion child?" the old priestess asked.

"Kaede I need you and Miroku to put up a spiritual barrier around the village," Kagome said forcing the tremors that shook her to ease. "Sango, gather up some of the hanyo who can fight. Let Tetsu and the other demons know I need them to project their youki behind the spiritual barrier once it's erected."

The slayer eyed her with a panicked look. "What are you going to do?"

Pulling Kangaimuryo from her sash, Kagome smiled and tilted her head. "Kohaku and I are going to hold back the army."

"You can't do that alone!" Sango protested.

Their group quieted and her friend gave her a begging look. For a moment she felt terrible, how horrible it must feel to know your brother is going to fight an entire army with a loose cannon you call a friend. But Kagome swallowed back the guilt and turned on her heel, someone exhaled heavily and she heard Sango release a strangled plea.

"Kohaku, after me," Kagome growled out, gripping fife so tight that her knuckles blanched and her fingers crunched against the instrument.

The undead boy followed her, his head kept low as Miroku's urgent commands to the others lilted behind them. Kagome would have to thank the monk for grabbing hold of the situation once she left. Snow and ice crunched beneath their footsteps, and sure enough as they approached the path down to the valley at the foothills, the approaching blur of a group lurched close.

"How are we going to do this, Lady Kagome?" Kohaku asked.

She hurried towards the foothills. "Quickly. And good enough to make a statement."

The boy nodded and followed her without further question. 

A daimyo sat astride a pale horse, his long-bladed lance pointed at their approach. At least a good two hundred soldiers trailed after him, lined up and marching perfectly to one another—bamboo and leather armor painted red, swords and spears glittering in the winter daylight. Kagome and Kohaku appeared as dark and grim as their environment compared to the intruders. 

“What do you want?” Kagome blocked the daimyo’s path, standing directly in front of his horse.

The creature whinnied and tottered skittishly. 

“We were sent to eliminate the threat of the Edo Matriarch,” the samurai snarled, “are you she?”

Her azure gaze flashed to crimson and her lips curled over her teeth in a taunting grin. “Does it particularly matter to you?”

“You’re underestimating the great shogun’s army if you’re mocking us,” the man continued. “After all, it’s just you and the child—” 

And then Kohaku was no longer by her side. He disappeared quickly in a flash, a stream of blood following his near invisible path. The daimyo’s head fell from his body to the ground, the severed corpse following it with a weighty thud. The horse shrieked and galloped away as the soldiers became outraged. Kagome bent down and grabbed the head by its hair, staring sympathetically at the lifeless eyes rolled back into the skull. 

“Well, I’m sure you’ll be more useful to me than the shogun,” she whispered, tossing the head out to the samurai who were now wavering back and forth like a restrained ocean tide ready to break across a dam. 

The echoing song of Kangaimuryo wailed across the valley as Kagome’s fingers danced along the fife. Soldiers now screamed as the body of their fallen lord stood to heavy feet, neck still gushing with fresh blood that spluttered over the rim of the wound. The sound of the instrument pitched higher, hands and heads of dead corpses began to pull up from the frigid earth. They broke forth the way a burrowing insect might, and breached into the open world. Taking wobbling step after wobbling step after the daimyo, the undead began to grow further in number, greater than the living troops. A smile wormed its way onto Kagome's lips and she lowered the fife—the animate corpses coming to a still.

Kohaku returned to her side, no hint of humanity in his eyes. They were completely pale, no pupil or iris. He too was lost to her call.

She giggled.

"Demon."

It was a whisper, hoarse and imperfect, that rose through the samurai ranks like a chant. They cowered back but weapons still drawn. Again there was that visible waver like a tide, back and forth, as if they weren't sure what to do. What were you supposed to do with a hoard of zombies between you and the person who killed your leader? 

Her hands flew to her chest and a tremor rumbled through her body. Where the Phoenix Amulet was safely tucked away against her sternum she could feel it waking and coming to life, drawing the resentful energy from the undead and their brothers buried too deep to surface. She realized what Naraku meant in that moment, all that time ago. Dig anywhere and there's bound to be bones. The amount of evil aura that permeated the ground practically pooled at her feet, and now that she'd untapped the faucet—there was no shutting it out. _Neat_. Clenching the Phoenix Amulet, Kagome opened her meridians and allowed the resentful energy to surge faster through her instead of at a mere trickle. Without another beat, Kohaku and the other feral corpses lunged towards the army without mercy.

There wasn't much left of the army, by the time the undead were finished with them. Resentful energy downpoured and washed over her without end, and it felt as if she were drowning. She took a shaking step forward, a beaten and worn loafer squelching in the slush created by gore. 

As she drew away her fife from her lips, one by one the creatures she commanded dropped lifeless, no longer animated by her song. The bloodlust leaked from her eyes and she gazed upon the battlefield with an azure gaze. She wanted to vomit. Covering her mouth she turned her back and called out to Kohaku. In an instant he appeared by her side, the brown of his eyes having returned and replaced the lifeless only-whites. There was a pained look on his expression and his hands twisted themselves. It was a good reminder knowing that this boy did not enjoy killing. In all fairness, she shouldn't have either.

The train of thought was immediately and abruptly lost as the squeal of a projectile through air whistled. Kagome cried out, her next step staggering as her hand flew to her shoulder, blood seeping through her fingers. The arrow point was buried deep in her flesh, she could feel it pulsing with holy energy. A snarl crossed her lips and she spun around to see Kikyo and Inuyasha standing on the far side of the battlefield. They were too distant to make out their expressions, but suddenly the samurai employer made sense. Who could deny the beckon of such a pure spirit as the Shikon Priestess, certainly her call to aid was far more a siren's cry than Kagome's flute playing.

"Lady Kagome!" Kohaku cried in shock, reaching out to brace her.

She pushed him out of the way as another arrow shrieked through the air and pierced straight through her other shoulder. Her scream wailed as she stumbled, her body shaking. Another pulse reverberated through the two arrows—and a familiar twinge of power, a reminiscent trace, tugged at the edge of her mind. Of a boy speared to a timeless tree by a straight and true arrow. This was the steps to sealing. Kikyo was trying to seal her away. And Inuyasha—

The hanyo approached her quickly, almost as if trying to catch her and support her from falling. She didn't understand.

He let Kikyo hurt her.

Over.

And over.

And over again.

He would always defend Kikyo until there was nothing left of Kagome.

Her breathing hitched and she could hardly make out what her friend was shouting at her.

"We can fix you, Kagome, but sealing you is our best chance."

_Why would you seal me away?_ Her hands gripped at her chest. Resentful energy vibrated dangerously in the air. She was bleeding everywhere. 

"Why would you let them attack everyone else?" She yelled, "they're innocent. And yet you and Kikyo sent a whole damn army to find me!"

"They were never supposed to enter the Burial Mounds," he tried to appease. "It was only to lure you out Kagome, Kikyo and I needed to bring you out to seal you! The resentful energy messes with your temperament, and it won't let us reason with you while you're awake."

Her ears burned and goosebumps lined the back of her neck and spine. From the distance she swore she could feel a smile, radiating and smug. Nails dug into her palms and she wanted to scream, this was all a set up. 

"It's dangerous but it's going to be totally okay! We can get you back to normal!"

_"This is my normal!"_ She wanted to cry, not noticing how Inuyasha's face totally changed, blanching and filling with worry. She couldn't breathe, her lungs, her throat, her stomach were all being filled with demonic aura. This was the thanks for her friendship? All of that running back and forth, throwing her life on the line, sticking her integrity out for his name, all of that was just for him to disregard her. Of all the times she'd always affirmed him and assured that he didn't need to change himself—that he was always his best self without having to change—he was now telling her to change herself? To be something she wasn't? Was she never going to be good enough for him? "Get back Inuyasha, or I will tear you limb from limb!"

"Kagome," His gaze sombered and he shook his head, reaching out. "Don't—"

"Don't what? Don't stop Kikyo from walking all over me like a doormat?" Her vision blanked and searing pain, where the Phoenix Amulet rested against her chest, branded her skin. "I refuse!"

Time stopped as she blinked away the haze of white hot anger that blinded her vision. She watched as if no longer in her body. As if wrapped in cotton, the world felt distant and muffled. Sound bounced like white noise and colors seemed to fade and brighten within one another. When she tried to move her arms and fingers to reach out or to even just budge a little, she found whatever marionette strings that pulled her to fall limp and broken. She couldn't hobble along, she couldn't tremble forward. She was stuck and forced to watch.

She was stuck and forced to watch Kohaku's hand tear into Inuyasha's chest. 

The boy's eyes were once again devoid of everything but the whites, his lips pulled back in a feral snarl. She couldn't speak. She hadn't raised Kangaimuryo to play a command. She only felt the thrashing pain of the Phoenix Amulet as it emptied the last of its stores into its nearest vessels. Kagome couldn't breathe. The nerves along Kohaku's temples bulged.

"Don't," Inuyasha's voice was broken and wet, his body becoming limp. "D-don't you want to see your family again?"

His body collapsed to the ground when Kohaku tore out his heart and crushed it in his fist.


	9. Strange Complex Thing of My Love

Kikyo stared at the pale cloth that covered the body. Contour of face and chest, she knew them so well. Their hut seemed so quiet without the carry of his voice and she loathed the fact that it was absent—that silent lay as heavy and stagnant as her pregnancy. Every moment she waited for him to stir, his body to creak and groan back to life. But it never did.

Coming off the battlefield had been surreal, like just waking and finding herself on the teetering edge or both sleep and life.

After the body had hit the ground, Kagome’s Ghost General—that was what Kikyo had dubbed the accompanying dead boy—had fled, Kagome slung over his shoulder. They had disappeared into the mountain. Kikyo at that point had been tempted to leave the corpse there, face first in the muck and gore as it had been dropped. But something tugged at her chest and she found herself wandering towards it. Bow and arrows had been dropped. The horse she then guided with the reins towards the mangled body. 

Golden eyes gazed unwavering and lifeless out at the massacre. 

It took a lot of maneuvering, and she almost gave up, pain in her belly telling her to just leave it. But something refused to let her hands stay. So after what felt like hours, she managed to cross it over the back of her mount.

Now here they were, four days passed, and Kikyo had yet to burn the corpse. It was fine, she'd cremate it.

Swallowing thickly, the thatch flap to the hut fluttered and she forced herself to regain her composure. A messenger peered in. 

"Lady Kikyo, the first sacrifice was burned and his ashes are properly sealed for your use. The second sacrifice is restrained and sedated."

She nodded and waved them off. 

Before she could visit the sacrifices, she’d assigned a meeting for herself and the shogun. As much as she despised having to put on an act and beg for aid—again—this next move was necessary. Perhaps initially she’d not expected the need to attack Kagome directly. The girl who housed Kikyo’s soul was a minor inconvenience at best. But the body beneath the sheet haunted her, and the idea of putting the soul to rest with Kagome’s blood sewn through the ground dearly eased her conscience. There was a rabid and ravenous ire that was only sated at the thought of the Edo Matriarch’s end. All things would be righted at that moment, the world would have been corrected. Inuyasha’s death before she could cause it herself would be avenged. Her soul would be properly contained within her own body again. And all of this demonic cultivation, which seemed to unite the demons and hanyou and the humans alike, would finally disappear with the quashing of the Burial Mounds village.

The boundaries set by the world which once separated the three would finally be restored. 

She pulled herself away from the hut and entered the frozen and cold world. Snow piled in drifts and mounds, and hoofprints lined every which way—clear paths long forgotten.

A warm outer layer made of thatching was left hanging on the outside of her hut. She drew it over her shoulders and shivered when she realized the lingering scent of Inuyasha remained on it. The desire to pitch it was overwhelming and nauseating, but it was too cold to forgo the extra winter protection.

Carrying a brazier in both his hands, the village messenger from earlier waddled over to Kikyo. Wrapping some of the less-hot coals in a thick cloth, she pocketed some of them, enjoying the warming sensation they left against her skin through the material of her garb. With one more breath of relief, she took the brazier and returned into the hut just long enough to dump the coals and embers of fire onto the corpse’s cloth. 

Almost immediately the white sheet caught flame.

She hurried from the hut back outside. “I will be staying with the shogun for at least the next day. When I return, I expect the hut Kaede had stayed in to be cleared and prepared for me.”

“Yes Lady Kikyo,” the messenger bowed respectfully.

Again she hated clambering onto her horse with the swell of her belly. But now more than ever did she need this child. It would help emass the Edo Matriarch’s downfall. 

“Ensure the fire does not catch the rest of the village,” Kikyo commanded, nose wrinkling when she caught the distinct stench of burning rot.

The messenger assured her he would keep watch. 

Riding to the shogun’s stronghold did not take long. Or maybe it did. Everything felt automatic, as if she were merely doing things from muscle memory. To her the scenery faded and appeared in a blink, only existing in a blur of emerald and opal watercolor until they arrived at the red gates that signalled the fort.

Gatekeepers called her arrival and she was admitted in.

Her audience with the shogun was immediate, and they saw her in seemingly before she could shake the snow and sleet from her outer layer. The meeting hall was warm, lit by sconces and a central fire. She made her way over to the lord her watched her with intrigue.

“You are the Shikon Miko.” It wasn’t a question, just a simple fact.

Kikyo inclined her head and slowly knelt before him, keeping her back rigid despite the pain that pulled at her lower spine. Gritting her teeth, she kept her eyes trained on him—intent evaluate his intentions. He seemed more curious than anything, and that made her scoff. A boy at heart it seemed. Fine, boys were emotional and she could use that to her advantage.

“I’m here to seek your assistance,” Kikyo said. “I’d sought a weaker militia and failed to take down the Burial Mounds or the Edo Matriarch. I need help.”

His posture shifted and his eyes widened with his gaze. “You wish to destroy the Edo Matriarch? That’s madness. Anyone across the state would know that she is not something to be trifled with. Rumor and tell have risen very quickly in the wake of her nefarious reputation.”

“Exactly why we must work together,” making a show of it, Kiko balled her fists and dipped her head downwards. “That demonic cultivator killed the father of my child. I want things righted.”

There was a moment of silence, and as tempted as it was to see the warring expressions wage on the man’s face, she knew to remain still and demure. He had to believe her pain. He didn’t know. 

He couldn’t know the pain of being separated from half of your soul.

His voice shook a bit, as if outraged. “The partner of the Shikon Miko must have been a great man indeed. Such a crime should not have happened against such an esteemed person like yourself. We will see these wrongs corrected.”

Kikyo had to force her lips not to upturn as she gave a delicate bow.

\---

The wind blowing snowflakes and ice into the flare of his bangs surprised him.

When Sesshomaru landed on the border of the Western lands, he found he couldn’t recollect if snow had permeated the grounds. Time flowed differently for him, and probably more akin to not at all, it seemed like just yesterday he’d delivered lotus pods to the miko for her growing village. Whom had been the main reason for his departure.

Traveling to the mainland had been arduous and taxing, not that someone such as himself would quiver at the journey. But it had taken more time than he’d preferred investigating.

On the mainland, there were more people aware of cultivation. He’d been hoping to find out more about the cultivators who relied on resentful energy rather than qi. Much to his disdain, the few records he found were neither helpful—and the few people who did have information did not carry much.

 _“Most demonic cultivators are quelled and their disciples diminished before they can spread,”_ one weary passerby had hissed. _“I’d cut ties with anyone like that if I were you.”_

The information from his trip had been dry and useless. Either being non-pertinent or things he’d discovered from his own observations. Only one sure-fire thing had been confirmed.

If Kagome did not cease her practices, the resentful energy being stored in both the Phoenix Amulet and drawn-in whenever she used Kangaimuryo, her mental state and her physicality would continue to deteriorate until there was nothing left of her. The unorthodox path did not leave its users unscathed. 

He turned his direction towards the mountains that housed the Burial Mounds. Nostrils flared. Teeth clenched. Jaw pulled taut. Ill boding pulled at every direction of his instincts and something told him that if he did not fight now—it would be too late to even flee. Snarling and clenching sharp claws into the palms of his hands, Sesshomaru began his return trek towards Kagome.

The scent of blood loomed faint and stale on the wind.


End file.
